WARNING: The following post contains excessive whining and may not be suitable for ANY audiences.
So you’re still here? Then let me further warn you that this is a full blown qasheh (stiff-necked), kicking hard against the goads posting. Last chance…proceed at your own risk.
So what’s got him all qashehy you might ask…okay, you probably didn’t. More likely you stuck around for the same reason we crane our necks when we drive by an accident on the freeway–we just can’t look away. It’s not in our nature. And that’s why I’m so qashehy–it’s my nature. But it has nothing to do with a car wreck…it’s all about my closet.

The closet got dropped off the day, no make that the moment I got saved. Don’t worry, you got one too, even if you didn’t notice it at the time. I didn’t. It’s a part of being born again; a big part, but one you likely overlooked…
Jesus answered him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.” 4 Nicodemus said to him, “How can a man be born when he is old? Can he enter a second time into his mother’s womb and be born?” 5 Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God. 6 That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. John 3:3-6 ESV
This is an old familiar story, and though I didn’t know much about the Bible when I got saved, I knew about being born again. I understood that when I accepted Jesus as my Savior I became a brand new me! And I realized the new Mike was the result of God’s work, not mine. I had that part right. But I also thought everything was taken care of at that moment, that I was completely transformed in the twinkling of an eye–yeah, I know, I know, I only missed that part by a lifetime! Since then I’ve come to realize that when the old Mike was reborn into the new Mike, it required a wardrobe change too…
…Put Off the Old Self…Put On the New Self…
Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. 6 On account of these the wrath of God is coming. 7 In these you too once walked, when you were living in them. 8 But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. 9 Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices 10 and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. 11 Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all. 12 Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. 14 And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. Colossians 3:5-14 ESV
And there’s our closet, it’s been right beside us the whole time, ready and waiting for us to take things off and put things on. Colossians 3 isn’t the only place we run into the ‘old man vs new man’ or ‘flesh vs Spirit’ either…the same basic teachings can be found in Philippians 2, Ephesians 4 or 5, Galatians 5, Romans 6 or 13, or…ahhh, okay, most of the New Testament touches on it in one way or another, there’s just too many to list. But right now let’s just look at the scripture above.
Notice the past tense...’seeing that you have put off the old self‘. We’re born again, the old self is gone…not going…GONE! But there is present tense too…‘Put to death therefore what is earthly in you,’…now you must put them all away:’ These aren’t gone…but they do need to GO!
BUT…what I don’t understand is why I have to take them all off…and put them all on…over, and over, and over again? Maybe there’s somebody out there that read those scriptures and said, “Got it. Done,”–but I’m not that guy!
Sadly, I am this guy…
My wife comes up and gently reminds me–because I asked her to, “The check engine light is still on.” I respond by gritting my teeth and glaring at the woman I love. ‘I don’t want to deal with the stupid car right now’, I think, feeling selfishness slip out of the closet and settle comfortably over my shoulders (my ‘selfish suit’ is my favorite garment, it goes with all my other flesh-ware). Laurie doesn’t say anything else, she just drops her eyes…probably to look at my clay feet.
“Fine!” I finally growl, reaching back into the closet to accent my attire with impatience and anger. My wife looks back up, hurt and confused by my unwarranted reaction–this is a goad, to get me to rethink my wardrobe. Instead I brush aside the fleeting stab of guilt and add another layer, bitterness–it won’t be the last, then I stomp out the door like a spoiled child–why not, self-pity fits me like an old glove. But it’s no big deal right? I was just having a bad day, like everyone does…I mean I wasn’t even really mad at my wife, I was just feeling a little…FLESHY?

I’m afraid that’s the answer. A quick glance at the other piece of furniture that follows me around confirms it. I look in the illuminated mirror at myself and all I see is flesh and more flesh…all the fruit of the Spirit...love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control…somehow they’re all back in the closet–AGAIN!!!
What good is putting on the ‘new man’ if he keeps wrapping himself in the same old filthy rags that the ‘old man’ wore? Sometimes it just seems unfair, it shouldn’t be this hard. Remember this…”For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” I don’t like to argue with the Lord…He’s God…He’s right. That I know; but I also know that keeping the flesh off, that’s not easy–not for this guy. But it’s not hopeless either. The Lord, through His Word and His leading have been helping me manage my wardrobe better in recent years–nowhere near what I need yet, but better. And not long ago He gave me a glimpse of something special when He introduced me to a woman named Linda…
It started off as an all too typical flesh-filled morning. Laurie and I had to go into the city–which I hate, to go shopping–which I hate more, to Home Depot on a warm, sunny day–meaning masses of people would ensure my time in Sodom would be prolonged to the maximum extent possible. All that indeed came to pass. By the time I finally escaped the bowels of the aforementioned putrid orange pit of despair I could hardly stand the fleshy stench of myself. Laurie was keeping me at arm’s length, possibly because I was wielding a razor edged, 10′ long sheet of tin roofing, but more likely because she was tired of me snapping her head off every time she tried to help me. Fast forward to me putting the roofing panel into the bed of my truck. As I swung it up over the bed rail I felt and heard a thud–the far end of the tin had hit something behind me. When I turned to look I found a nice shiny new solid black Jeep–well, mostly solid…other than the inch long scratch I’d just gouged in its side. I’d been mad all morning–that instantly turned to rage. I’m surprised I didn’t slice a finger off as I threw the roofing into the back of my truck. Then the door of the Jeep opened and the Holy Spirit said, “Enough!”

Linda stepped out of the Jeep every bit as angry as I was, but a whole lot louder about it. There was literally no consoling her, and in the mood I was in, that wasn’t likely to happen anyway. Except I was no longer in that mood. I can tell you honestly, it felt like I didn’t even have a speaking part for the next half hour or so. To this day I don’t know much about Linda, but I can tell you this, there had to be something special about her or her situation, because the Holy Spirit made sure that she got handled with the utmost love and tenderness. I don’t know why, but the angrier she got, and the more she railed and accused me of ruining much more than her paint job, the more it made me want to–need to take care of her.
When it was all over, and Linda had gone her way–she actually seemed somewhat at peace with how things had turned out, Laurie turned to me and said, “Wow, you were amazing.” I agreed–that what had happened was amazing, but I assured her it wasn’t me. It wasn’t me…no way! I can be nice when others aren’t, I’m capable of that these days. But when someone is yelling at me, accusing me of some very bad things…when facing that, to truly put on love, patience, gentleness, kindness…that wasn’t me–I’m not that guy. I believe with all my heart that it was Divine intervention–not the overused, misused phrase…the real thing.
If you have a hard time believing that, remember that we’re talking about the ‘fruit of the Spirit’ here…capital “S”, meaning the Holy Spirit. Like I pointed out earlier, I can produce a ‘kind of’ fruit on my own. I can act lovingly without really loving, I can be patient on the outside while burying a root of bitterness on the inside…and so on, etc, etc. But to truly love someone who is hating me, to be absolutely okay with (patient/long suffering) someone who is making my life miserable…those things come from the Holy Spirit and Him alone–not this guy.
What happened that day at Home Depot, while uplifting, has also been somewhat disheartening. Being apart of something so right makes it hard to live with the fact that I still pull the wrong things out of my closet waaaaaaaaay too often. Sadly, my ‘selfish-suit’ is still by far my most worn garment, and I have no illusions that I’ll ever ‘outgrow‘ it, not until the day of Christ Jesus. But there are days when I do much better with my attire…days when the flesh stays off longer, replaced by true fruit. Those days happen when I take time make time to focus on the Lord. I’m not talking about prayer, or Bible reading–though both of those are hugely important and are often a part of that time. What I’m talking about is finding a secluded place and spending some quality time alone with the Lord. Just like He’s right there in the room with me–because He is! So I talk with Him, and I try to listen as much as I speak. But most important of all, I just let His Holy Spirit wash over me, helping me abide in Him, while He abides in me. When I get those times right, my days are so much less fleshy.
I still get qesheh…still hate my closet…don’t understand why being ‘born again’ didn’t get me a permanent wardrobe change. And there are still many, many days of too much flesh and not nearly enough fruit. Some days it seems futile, and almost hopeless, but by the grace of God, and the tireless efforts of the Holy Spirit, I know I’ll press on–I am that guy.
May He that began a good work in you be faithful to complete it until the day of Christ Jesus,
Mike
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